(((My Fellow Americans))) #48: Pony Up With Vermin Supreme

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FULL TRANSCRIPT TEXT

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[Music]
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and now you’re watching my fellow
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Americans with your host spike yes yes
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thank you I’m back I am back keep
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clapping keep clapping because I’m back
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thank you for clapping how will you know
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that you’re happy that I’m back if you
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didn’t keep clapping welcome to my
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fellow Americans I am literally spike
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Cohen I am so happy that you could be
02:45
here tonight with me
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spike Cohen as you know I’ve been gone a
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couple of weeks I had to go out of town
02:52
for a very Jewish thing and then I
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heroically fled hurricane Dorian the
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following week single-handedly saving
02:59
myself and my family from its ravaging
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storminess I was very heroic deed for me
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but now I am back this is a Muddy Waters
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for this and every episode of my fellow
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Americans comes from the amazing and
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again mr. Joe Davi I’d like to
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kroger for this delicious purify
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every episode of my fellow Americans
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that is beautiful drinking water thank
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you so much
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shout out to Tamara on Turks is mom and
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I’m as always guys my guest tonight
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needs no introduction and yet here I am
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continuing to talk he has been running
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for public office since 1987 he has been
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a presidential candidate as a Republican
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as a Democrat and as an independent he’s
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currently running for the Libertarian
04:51
Party nomination to be the next
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president ladies and gentlemen my fellow
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Americans please welcome to the show mr.
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vermin supreme vermin thank you for
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coming on
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I’m doing well you I we don’t I can hear
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your audio but they can’t hold on one
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second
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I will wait a second okay say something
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now hello can you hear me yeah they can
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hear you now so I’m very excited to have
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you on I’m also grateful that we’re
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doing this remotely because I just
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washed my hair and I didn’t want to be
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glitter bomb so I appreciate that and
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guys yeah guys be sure to comment with
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your questions and thoughts and vermin
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and I will tell you if you are right or
06:00
wrong now vermin this is your first time
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on the show and the first thing I always
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ask my guess is to tell me how you
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describe your political beliefs and then
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to tell me a little story but Diddy if
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you will about how you came to those
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beliefs was it an aha moment or kind of
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a gradual evolution tell us you were
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Diddy well sir let me say this about
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that I am a libertarian I come from the
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left
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anarchist perspective that’s where I cut
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my teeth okay leave her in mutual aid
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and such things and of course up until
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oh maybe 2008 you might find me saying
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things about libertarians that weren’t
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entirely a complimentary and such
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however I believe that these are beliefs
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that I had at that time were indeed a
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form of prejudice because I did not know
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any libertarians because of course
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libertarians have a number of negative
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stereotypes with which they have to deal
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with on a daily basis and of which many
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normal people if you will believe to be
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true and it took me quite a while
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working with various libertarians over
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the years mainly up in New Hampshire
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associates in the Free State Project and
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the like and I have come around I have
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read the libertarian party platform
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right and I was able to dovetail many of
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my beliefs into the Libertarian Party I
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was a libertarian but did not even quite
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realize it the libertarian party being
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one that supports the individual one
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that is against the state that is
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against the war that is against
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overreaching government surveillance
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against the police state are the things
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I had word me and then when I found out
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that these were things that I also had
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in common with the libertarian party I
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was able to integrate myself with the
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party and decided that I should continue
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my never-ending campaign for the
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presidency towards the libertarian party
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that’s cool that you’ve been now you
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didn’t start running for president in
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1987 but you ran for what may or
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something like that in 87 yes that my
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first one was in 1987 I was running for
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mayor of Baltimore Maryland it was not a
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political statement it was more of as a
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lark just for something to do something
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to entertain myself and that was that so
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we we act like right oh no I was gonna
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say so you you ran in 87 we my family
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took five year old me and fled to Myrtle
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Beach from Baltimore that’s actually
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where I was born and we fled in 1988 no
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doubt because you did not win the
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mayoral election that’s that’s probably
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true that unfortunately mr. smoke was
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generally recognized as the mayor at
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that time was indeed a very critical
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campaign it was very strange time in my
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life I was sort of done with Baltimore
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and I was sort of planning my escape but
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I had no plan to escape and so my life
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was sort of going to shit you might say
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and at that time that’s when I declared
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that I was running for mayor just
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because I thought it was an interesting
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thing that might keep me there but in
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the meantime it was a 19
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86 that the great piece marks for global
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nuclear disarmament which was a protest
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march that March from Los Angeles to
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Washington DC rolled through town and
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essentially one of my roommates came
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home and they brought some people from
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that March and I went to Memorial
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Stadium and I saw this amazing group of
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people 5,000 people at that point with
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the entire infrastructure that was
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required to move such a large group of
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people down the road there was obviously
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porta potti trucks lots of them they had
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their own sewer pumping honeypot trucks
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they had kitchens several kitchens they
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had semi-trailer trucks hauling like
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peoples up to milk crates of possessions
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that they were allowed to bring with
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them you know there was just as in very
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large social mobile movement and it was
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a very inspirational thing to save and
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when I saw that rowing through Baltimore
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at that time I immediately went to a
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thrift store I picked up a clean change
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of clothing I picked up a cheap sleeping
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bag and I started walking with the the
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members of this great peace march I
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walked with them to DC now there was a
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weekend of a civil disobedience people
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throwing their shoes that they had
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walked across the country with over the
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White House fence there was rallies and
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there was sort of the beginning of the
11:13
height of the anti-nuclear movement in
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the 80s right and I met some some
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anarchists and I met some a bunch of
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people that I know to this very day they
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got together they formed a small
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collective called seeds of peace they
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were able to purchase some of the
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logistical equipment including a kitchen
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trailer a big water tank and a porta
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potti truck six six or eight
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porta-potties on a truck and so they
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were able to they want to continue the
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work of us of sustaining these mobile
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protest marches right whoa
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yes no I said right oh right and so I
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started
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I joined this collective and started I
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joined them in their first March which
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was from Kings Bay Georgia where they
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were deploying the nuclear submarines
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down to Cape Canaveral where they were
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testing the Trident d5 first strike
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missile at the time and at the end of
12:19
the March a number of people actually
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went back country and infiltrated the
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Cape Canaveral Air Force Base in order
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to disrupt the plan tests of the Trident
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missiles and so that sort of introduced
12:37
me to my life of activism and from there
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I started doing other another piece
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March in Michigan and then one in New
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England and I met my wife at during this
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time I also started attending rainbow
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gatherings are you familiar with the the
12:56
rainbow family of living love and light
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and their gatherings is that these are
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the hippies that like a few thousand of
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them go into like national parks and
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stuff every once in a while national
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force national parks but yes imagine if
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you will
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three to four thousand people in
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concentric circles having dinner up to a
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hundred different kitchens in the woods
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scattered through the woods bringing
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five-gallon buckets down to this dinner
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circle five thousand people getting fed
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also during this circle people are going
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around giving information announcements
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and the magic cat goes round and because
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there are non commercial events because
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they’re held it on public plan there’s
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no way there’s no commerce occurring
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yeah because that would endanger our
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ability to gather on land and so the
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only way thing you can money is to throw
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it into the magic bucket and so the
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magic bucket goes around the money is
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collected it goes to the banking council
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the banking council counts the money
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they announce the money that they’ve
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made
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then they interface with the supply
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council and then the supply council
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meets up with the kitchen council where
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all the hundred kitchens send
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representative
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with their shopping list the shopping
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lists go to the main supply main supply
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goes to town with the money comes back
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with the supply it goes out to the
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kitchen if the kitchens cook it up and
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then bring it down and that’s sort of
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the cycle how it occurs and also this
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money is used to buy a water pipe
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because there are is literally miles of
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water pipe the rainbow family ends up
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tapping Springs so that there is running
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water to these kitchens so there’s
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everybody couldn’t wash their hands and
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well and it’s a beautiful and artistic
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organism right is this very autonomous
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zone no is in charge and things only get
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done because people get together and and
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council up and decide how to get this
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done and so it was sort of this in that
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environment where I start to learn to be
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a real crazy wacky clown because it’s
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sort of Rainbow Gathering as you can
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sort of make your own reality and part
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of my reality became being a funny clown
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the coming up with the amusing little
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entertaining bits and going from Camp to
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camp and group to group and and
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entertaining them I also continued my
15:26
stage craft in Baltimore I was a ran a
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couple of night clubs and I was doing
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the door and doing the doing the
15:35
introduction work and the emcee duties
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and so I started hosting and emceeing
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talent shows at the Rainbow Gathering
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because there’s a lot of it’s not an
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electric entertainment it’s all acoustic
15:45
and a lot of talent shows and things so
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there’s stages and started working that
15:51
angle of it right and also of course so
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that this was a several year period
15:56
where I was out of the Nevada nuclear
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test site in the early 90s where we
16:02
could we’re literally thousands of
16:04
people are getting arrested crossing
16:06
into the Nevada nuclear test site going
16:07
back country at the Nevada nuclear test
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site doing a symbolic civil disobedience
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and it was a very exciting time and I
16:16
was also bringing in my clowning skills
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and my candidacy for various offices
16:24
into these
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politically charged in tense situations
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and and also after a while in the
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rainbow gatherings I also it came to my
16:37
attention that one of the many services
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that we provide for our own selves at
16:41
these events is security and security is
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of course a very important thing and so
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I started working with the Shantae Sina
16:50
which is a Sanskrit for peacekeeper or
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some other cultural appropriation phrase
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but part of this you know it’s it’s
16:58
essentially crisis counseling it’s camp
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counseling’s it’s really a glorified
17:02
camp counselor on steroids if you will
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and it’s sort of like trying to deal
17:08
with conflict defuse a neighborhood
17:11
situations domestic disputes things of
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this nature
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but one of the other services that we
17:17
provide is escorts no we’re not
17:20
providing escorts but we’re that would
17:22
be that would be quite a conflict
17:24
resolution but we escort the media if
17:28
meteor is coming in to check it out the
17:31
scene we usually try and have some
17:34
peacekeeper with them because a lot of
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the rainbow people are very freaky
17:38
skittish about having their pictures
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taken and things like that so it’s good
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to warn them that the media is gonna
17:45
take pictures or whatever and another
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group in particular that gets escorted
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through our gatherings is the police and
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so I found myself spending you know an
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eight-hour shift escorting being walking
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with the cops
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you know eight Alabama state troopers or
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you know just all sorts of various very
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uptight cops walking into the gathering
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and it would give me the opportunity to
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number one warn the people that they
18:17
were coming in in the rainbow we all
18:19
have six up as a warning to people so
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they can leash their dog and hide their
18:23
drugs and what have you and also
18:26
propagandize the police and and use my
18:30
humor as I was learning to in in the
18:34
clowning situation to help facilitate a
18:38
smooth
18:39
for these folks through sometimes
18:41
hostile crowds and line right right and
18:43
and so doing this I mean that sir
18:47
prepared me and made me feel very
18:50
comfortable dealing with cops on a not
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conferred confrontational that more of
18:56
an oppositional yet respectful type of
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calling them out on shit and things of
19:03
that nature with humor and that prepared
19:06
me to bring that those skills I mean
19:08
essentially what I am is sort of a sum
19:10
of a skillset that I have to developed
19:14
and picked up and perfected if you will
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over the years right
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I was able to bring these skills out
19:20
into riot world and of course in riot
19:23
world there’s oftentimes a lot of tense
19:25
situations between the police and the
19:28
protesters and and there’s oftentimes
19:31
there’s a vacuum between the two and in
19:34
that vacuum pretty much anything could
19:37
happen and will happen yeah you may be a
19:40
cop will take a cheap shot with their
19:41
pepper spray or maybe somebody will
19:43
throw something at the cops or write
19:45
anything and and and it’s then it
19:48
becomes this tit-for-tat thing and it’s
19:50
essentially it’s a script and if you got
19:51
an idea of what the script is going to
19:53
be I have found that you can sort of
19:56
step in and preempt it or change it and
19:59
so I have found myself occupying this
20:03
space between the protesters between the
20:06
cops in an attempt to keep a chill if
20:10
you will and this of course was back in
20:13
the day when peacekeepers and parade
20:16
marshals you know they were part of a
20:18
protest marches in there you know people
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helping facilitate crowds to freely
20:24
exercise their First Amendment rights
20:26
right and after all of you know and then
20:30
bringing in the politician thing into it
20:33
and all of these things and it just
20:35
seemed to be this really tricky way of
20:39
de-escalating some really crazy
20:41
situations over the years very cool so
20:45
that brings us to your current run for
20:47
the White House now I’ve done an
20:49
extensive amount of research on you and
20:52
your platform and I
20:53
a contact high from it so thank you for
20:55
that your platform seems to be built
20:57
around four main things in your agenda
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and the first and most prominent one of
21:02
course being what you describe as a pony
21:03
based economy or Pony nom –ax tell us a
21:06
little about Pony Atomics well the first
21:10
thing that you need to understand about
21:12
Tony nominee people always say to me
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vermin are we really going to be used
21:17
ponies for currency and I say don’t be
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ridiculous
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until we can make them very small of
21:25
course anything you have people working
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on that naturally but the thing to
21:31
understand about a pony based economy is
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that they are free ponies of course
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number one there they’re absolutely free
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that they come from other ponies when a
21:40
boy pony meets a girl pony well they get
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together and you know and they do the
21:45
thing and right I could get rather
21:48
graphic and sometimes I do but we’ll
21:50
just leave it at that for now okay and
21:52
11 months gestation periods later well a
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free Pony comes out of the the mama pony
21:58
so that’s it’s a beautiful thing it’s a
22:01
fact of nature and it’s the the basis of
22:04
the free Pony based economy now once
22:08
everybody has their own personal free
22:13
pony well we own the ponies essentially
22:17
and when you own something you also own
22:20
the equity that exists in that object or
22:25
thing and so we have equity in our
22:29
ponies so naturally once we’ve
22:30
established equity in our ponies we will
22:32
be able to borrow against it so we will
22:37
be borrowing against the equity that our
22:39
ponies that we’ve received for free
22:42
possess now watch we have established
22:46
Pony based debt well that is where
22:50
things get very interesting because as
22:53
we all know jet is essentially a
22:55
currency in and of its own I mean
22:58
nations run on it banks run on it
23:01
collection agencies run on it so once we
23:03
just Atlas Pony based debt then we are
23:06
going to be able to create
23:07
all sorts of Pony based debt financial
23:10
instruments we’re gonna bring in the
23:11
smartest and the smartest of the
23:14
smartest to make up a pony default
23:16
triple-a default swaps and you know
23:19
treble pony assets and sorts of things
23:22
like pony pop pony pony pawnshops pony
23:26
pawnshops all these things and
23:27
essentially what it’s going to do is
23:29
going to create a pony based bubble in
23:32
the economy and as everybody knows a
23:36
bubble is one of the most wonderful
23:38
things to have in your economy at the
23:40
time that it is in your economy because
23:42
what it means is that the economy is
23:44
red-hot it means that everybody’s
23:47
working all cylinders are firing
23:50
everybody’s making lots of money the
23:53
stock market’s going up and up and up
23:55
and the important thing to realize about
23:57
this particular Pony based economy
23:59
bubble is that it will be reinforced
24:03
steel belted and lasts forever
24:07
thank you I’m cutting supreme I support
24:10
a pony based economy that sounds amazing
24:11
and so you you break it down into the
24:13
universal Pony health care system social
24:15
Pony security the federal hay stamp
24:18
program now there are more yes in fact
24:20
I’ve been elaborating on the the
24:23
universal Pony care proposal and of
24:26
course it does involve one apple per
24:28
person per day a sugar cube if you
24:33
really deserve it and unfortunately if
24:36
you break your leg we will have to put
24:38
you down that’s that’s just the
24:41
government death panel thing you know
24:44
wait just one second because some other
24:46
journalists and professional pundits out
24:47
there in the lamestream media might be
24:50
willing to let you get away with without
24:51
asking you the hard questions about Pony
24:53
na mcc’s but not on an August program
24:55
such as mine I’m seeing a very gleaming
24:58
omission here
24:59
and I’m not gonna let it pass leave me
25:02
like someone’s shiny shiny teeth
25:04
perhaps no well my question is this do
25:07
you or do you not plan to give free
25:10
ponies to illegal aliens well once again
25:15
of course they I was thinking of more
25:17
long lines of burrows would be probably
25:20
more appropriate
25:20
for the illegal Mexican immigrants
25:23
that’s that’s actually with a magic
25:26
lingo I mean we can make every illegal
25:30
immigrant legal just by Fiat just by
25:33
saying so just by magically passing some
25:36
legislation I mean can a human being
25:39
really be a illegal
25:40
not with a pony pony I shared your Pony
25:45
anomic splat form with my wife and I I’m
25:47
not gonna lie she was very concerned
25:49
about potential animal welfare issues
25:51
namely how was a supreme administration
25:54
going to make sure the ponies are well
25:55
cared for and precisely what do you plan
25:57
to do with all the pony poop well that’s
26:00
it kind of course the the pony poop is
26:01
going to provide valuable methane gas
26:04
once it’s processed and it will add
26:07
wonderful compost to re-up America is a
26:10
soil that’s been wasted by a big
26:12
agribusiness will be a unemployed
26:17
Americans will be conscripted into the
26:20
pony poop collection Corps of America
26:23
providing one hundred percent
26:25
unemployment
26:26
I’m sorry a hundred percent employment
26:29
it’s a jobs creation program and so that
26:32
the poop won’t be in the street for long
26:33
no there’ll be pony poop collection
26:35
facilities every few hundred feet or so
26:37
so so there’s that and as far as the
26:41
pony welfare I mean of course people are
26:44
people will have a self-interest in
26:47
making sure that their pony is taken
26:49
care of and well-fed it’s all it’s the
26:53
invisible hooves the invisible hooves of
26:55
the marketplace will guarantee people
26:58
taking care of that very valuable asset
27:01
that they own and that they’ll be able
27:03
to borrow against and love and have an
27:06
and cherish because ponies are are
27:08
really nice I think we can all agree on
27:12
that now my one of my actually one of
27:15
our sponsors
27:16
personal injury attorney Chris Reynolds
27:17
attorney at law he if you live anywhere
27:22
if you live in Florida friend call Chris
27:24
Reynolds uh Chris asks he says this
27:26
sounds a little bit like pony slavery
27:29
what say you to that well there
27:32
that aspect of it I will not deny it
27:36
however I believe the important thing to
27:39
ask yourself is are you familiar with
27:42
the the movie series the Planet of the
27:45
Apes yes yes so you see it is almost
27:51
essential to enslave a nonhuman animal
27:57
race in order for it to evolve rapidly
28:01
and rise up against its humans
28:05
taskmasters to us sort of a long-range
28:08
plan in order to create a pony dominance
28:12
over the humans it may take a few
28:14
generations but I’m willing to take that
28:17
risk
28:18
pony liberation yes we must enslave them
28:22
first before we can liberate them
28:24
through a full-on Pony based revolution
28:28
but that’s why in the future we don’t
28:30
have to worry about that that’s
28:31
something for your grandchildren to deal
28:33
with do you gonna be great for you do
28:36
you consider yourself a furry no I do
28:41
not consume I am fairly furry and once
28:44
again I’m a mr. October in this coming
28:47
years libertarian dadbod calendar look
28:51
it up on Facebook libertarian dad bought
28:56
yeah oh yeah you were ready with that
28:59
one oh yeah so that’s an exciting sneak
29:04
preview fine now so okay cool um I can’t
29:11
get the feeling but I’m changing the
29:12
subject and I can never remember what
29:14
the original subject is I don’t I’m sure
29:17
it was very important the second
29:18
platform of your very aggressive agenda
29:20
is what you call the war on plaque many
29:23
of my followers are concerned of course
29:24
that your plan to force everyone to
29:26
brush and floss their teeth could be
29:29
perceived as authoritarian can you
29:31
present the libertarian argument for
29:33
mandatory tooth brushing of course not
29:37
okay
29:38
thank you I think it’s an important I
29:42
know libertarians are very reasonable
29:45
people
29:45
I mean there
29:46
they’re very aware either they’re very
29:48
woke if you will and they understand
29:51
that a little bit authoritarianism is
29:54
good for you I think we can all agree
29:57
for that I mean otherwise I mean are you
30:00
really gonna brush your teeth are you
30:01
gonna make your bed or you’re gonna put
30:02
your clothes away I’ll come on mom I
30:04
don’t wanna well let me sleep a little
30:06
more
30:06
that we all need a little bit of
30:08
authoritarianism in our life or am i
30:10
right parents and so yeah and as far as
30:13
nanny states go I believe it’s important
30:16
that give you give the the government
30:19
just a little bit of leeway and I mean
30:22
in what they do for your protection your
30:26
protection
30:27
you and your children’s protection
30:30
who else is gonna save you some for
30:32
black is it going to be you your
30:34
neighbors is gonna be flossing or will
30:36
it be the government that brings us to
30:39
you gingivitis has been a road in the
30:42
gum line of this great nation of ours
30:43
for long enough and must be stopped for
30:46
too long our country’s been suffering a
30:49
great oral and moral decay in spirit and
30:51
incisors a country’s future depends on
30:54
its ability to bite back we can no
30:56
longer be a nation indentured our very
30:59
salvation is at stake won’t you join me
31:03
as we cross over the bridge work into
31:04
the 23rd century let us bite the bullet
31:06
and brace ourselves as we become a sea
31:10
of shining smiling faces from sea to
31:12
shining smiling smiling smiling shiny
31:14
shiny smiling smiling shining shining
31:15
smiling smiling smiling shiny shiny
31:17
smiling see now it’s Ignat course this
31:20
mandatory tooth brushing law is not
31:22
about the secret dental police kicking
31:24
down your door at 3:00 a.m. to make sure
31:26
that you have brushed no no it’s not
31:29
about the preventive dental maintenance
31:31
detention facilities no it is absolutely
31:35
not it’s not about the dental
31:37
reeducation centers it’s not about the
31:39
government-issued toothpaste containing
31:41
an addictive yet harmless substance no
31:44
it’s not even about the DNA gene
31:47
splicing is greater waste a race of
31:49
winged monkeys to act as tooth fairy
31:52
enforcers what this mandatory tooth
31:54
brushing law is really all about is
31:56
strong teeth for a strong America thank
32:00
you
32:00
I’m vermin supreme interesting sidenote
32:02
the mandatory tooth brushing law has
32:05
been one of my longest planks it was
32:09
part of my 1987 mayoral campaign a
32:12
reference to it and it was inspired by
32:15
Massachusetts the one of the first
32:19
states in the nation that implemented a
32:20
mandatory seatbelt law and one of those
32:24
stickers that they put out a bumper
32:26
sticker said buckle up it’s the law and
32:29
it occurred to me at that time that boy
32:31
that’s a pretty stupid law maybe makes a
32:33
lot of sense but does it need to be a
32:35
law right and what could be a stupider
32:38
law and yes friends the mandatory tooth
32:42
brushing law sprang forth and I’ve been
32:46
a little blessed with coming up with
32:47
these very simple elegant and effective
32:52
devices that seem to have a great
32:54
residence you know a toothbrush
32:56
everybody brushes their teeth every day
32:58
we could only hope so you know people
33:00
hold a toothbrush but it’s you know when
33:04
I traveled euro land I hit 22 different
33:06
countries and I translated the phrase
33:08
brush your teeth it’s the law and people
33:11
understood that people got it you know
33:13
when you start talking about secret
33:14
dental police people get it essentially
33:18
uh you know I the mandatory tooth
33:21
brushing law was the entire text of the
33:23
Patriot Act
33:24
they simply stripped out the the dental
33:26
stuff so yes so and speaking of which
33:33
speaking of the Patriot Patriot Act as
33:34
I’m sure you know today is the 18th
33:37
anniversary of 9/11 do you remember what
33:41
you had for lunch today there were no
33:45
towers for lunch I’m just say there were
33:52
no towers ever ever okay thank you I had
34:00
a nice filet of smoked salmon topped
34:02
with sauerkraut and a bowl of
34:04
blackberries now one of the another one
34:08
of your plastics you know there’s
34:10
there’s a bagel store in uh in Chicago
34:13
that is named a sandwich
34:14
after me sure what effect called the
34:16
vermin supreme I think they call it
34:19
something else but it’s a it has my
34:22
picture on it okay that’s nice I like
34:25
that so another one of your lesser
34:27
agendas is the what you call the all-out
34:29
war on the godless read Chinese bastards
34:32
in order to recapture our national debt
34:34
and manufacturing base initiative or a
34:37
Oh wo t gr c bi o TR co n d a small a m
34:44
bi which is conveniently also the
34:47
address to your Bitcoin wallet do you
34:50
have anything you want to share about AO
34:52
wo t gr cbio III believe I have
34:56
moderated my opinions since that time I
34:59
believe maybe reading for my 2008
35:02
project vote smart entry is that true
35:05
I’m not sure it was somewhere on the
35:07
internet and it had your face on it yeah
35:09
well of course that the Chinese are now
35:11
our friends and our massive trading
35:14
partners and in tariffs partners and all
35:15
that good stuff
35:16
so I think we like the the godless of
35:18
Red Chinese communist bastards now I
35:21
think they’re our number one trading
35:23
partner so now it’s all about Narnia I I
35:27
focused on Narnia and middle-earth and
35:30
we’re not gonna stop until we take them
35:33
all out until we get every last or I
35:37
think that that’s very reasonable so
35:39
this is the time that I will be doing a
35:41
shameless plug hey gang are you thinking
35:43
of starting a podcast well I hope to
35:45
hell you are because anchor is the
35:46
easiest way to make a podcast anchor
35:48
gives you everything you need in one
35:49
place for free which you can use right
35:52
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35:53
creation tools you see that allow you to
35:55
record and edit your podcast so it
35:56
sounds great they’ll distribute your
35:59
podcast for you so it can be heard
36:00
everywhere from Spotify Apple podcasts
36:02
Google podcasts and many more you can
36:05
even make money from your podcast with
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no minimum listenership now I know what
36:09
you’re thinking friend no minimum
36:10
listenership great day in the morning
36:12
well you’re gonna have a great day in
36:14
the morning too when you download the
36:16
anchor app or go to anchor dot F M to
36:18
get started just as soon as this program
36:20
is over do not leave until this program
36:22
is over
36:22
vermin I’ve never lied in my entire life
36:25
and I refuse to do
36:27
money off you puck yes I do with no
36:29
minimum listenership Wow that’s very
36:32
cool hey I’ll be one more ha how do I
36:34
begin
36:35
well vermin I’ll tell you what all you
36:36
got to do is go to the anchor app or go
36:38
to anchor Don FM to get started today
36:42
all right I’m gonna do that as soon as
36:44
as soon as this podcast ends hi you know
36:47
my new podcast and I we will give it the
36:51
link to that now vermin I’ve never lied
36:53
in my entire life I refused to start now
36:54
many of my fans and followers have
36:57
expressed some very deep reservations
36:58
with me both publicly and privately
37:00
about my having you on the show some of
37:02
them think that you’re damaging the
37:04
Liberty movement that major media is
37:06
seizing upon your candidacy and the the
37:08
silly parts of your platform to try to
37:10
make the Libertarian Party and
37:11
libertarianism in general look like a
37:13
joke what do you say to people who are
37:15
understandably concerned that you may be
37:18
spoiling the work that they’re that
37:20
they’ve done to grow the party well let
37:23
me say this about that I respectfully
37:26
disagree this run this campaign seeking
37:32
the Libertarian Party nomination is
37:34
arguably my first real campaign I mean
37:38
it’s a natural extension of 30 years of
37:40
campaigning for the presidency and it
37:44
feels very natural and I don’t believe
37:47
it is a detriment to the Libertarian
37:49
Party I am making an offer if you will
37:53
I’m I’ve been spent these thirty years I
37:56
have developed a character I have
37:58
developed a universe and I have
38:01
developed quite a fan base and this year
38:04
out of all the years I have an actual
38:08
libertarian based campaign staff and
38:10
they are very confident in my abilities
38:14
to present the libertarian message to
38:16
the public at large I believe that I am
38:18
indeed in a very good place to be able
38:23
to present the the planks of the
38:26
Libertarian Party platform because in my
38:28
estimation if I am chosen to front
38:32
little bit Arian party I will indeed be
38:35
focusing on the Libertarian Party
38:36
platform in addition to the zombies and
38:38
ponies and stuff I use
38:41
little skit it’s in little of plays and
38:45
things of that nature you know my
38:48
demographic is a mainly young people and
38:52
I look at the the current field and it’s
38:56
certainly nothing against the card field
38:57
but uh the bubble with which I have
38:59
surrounded myself do indeed believe that
39:03
I am possibly the only candidate with an
39:06
F name recognition to potentially get 5%
39:09
of the general election vote and of
39:11
course 5% is the gold standard for a
39:14
Libertarian Party candidate that in that
39:16
5% assures a ballot access for the
39:20
following four years the the figures
39:24
that I throw around are that there are
39:25
three point nine million high school
39:27
kids graduate a year give me two of
39:29
those years 2019 2020 that’s about eight
39:32
million kids add them on to the
39:34
seventeen million kids who are attending
39:37
college in any given year that’s a pool
39:39
of about 25 million voters if I can get
39:43
one out of four of those kids to vote
39:45
for me that equals the 6.5 million
39:48
voters that equals five percent now that
39:51
does not exclude or that does not
39:53
include the amazing millions and
39:57
millions of people that do not vote did
39:59
not vote and it also does not begin to
40:03
touch my nerd fan base essentially you
40:07
know my the people who appreciate what I
40:10
do sort of fall under this giant
40:13
umbrella and there’s are like all these
40:15
counterculture subcultures from crypto
40:19
nerds to magic the card game nerds to to
40:25
to demolition-derby nerds to roller
40:29
derby girl nerds to Comic Con nerds you
40:34
know beautiful people but they’re all
40:37
united under this sort of geek slash
40:39
nerd banner I’m not saying that in any
40:42
sort of rocketry fashion but leave that
40:44
my campaign has the potential to become
40:48
a viral sensation I I believe has the
40:51
ability to really catch on for the
40:55
those malcontents sand discontents and
40:57
the disillusioned and disgusted and the
41:00
people who have had just enough with the
41:02
system such as it is I also understand
41:05
that there is a major concern amongst
41:09
libertarian and party members that can a
41:13
serious party put up a person who is
41:17
perceived to be a joke candidate and not
41:19
be perceived as a joke party and I
41:22
believe that it is purely in the framing
41:25
and I believe that it could be framed so
41:27
that it could be successful it could be
41:29
something as simple as yes we are as a
41:31
libertarian party we are a party of
41:33
ideas ideals and values and we believe
41:37
and certain things and we act on these
41:39
things and we strive to to make the
41:41
world a better place
41:42
however pivot the current duopoly
41:46
presidential election system has indeed
41:50
risen to the level of the of a joke and
41:53
with love and spite here’s vermin
41:57
supreme and essentially I’m not out to
42:01
troll the Libertarian Party I am out
42:03
offering my services to help the
42:07
Libertarian Party troll America and you
42:13
know I mean I think your that the
42:14
hurdles that are in front of me are
42:17
conceptual I believe it says you know
42:21
it’s definitely trying something very
42:23
different and but it’s something that I
42:25
and others believe could be successful
42:29
and I believe that the Libertarian Party
42:32
could certainly survive averman supreme
42:35
candidacy and if I receive this honor
42:39
and this nomination I will do everything
42:41
within my ability and powers to to make
42:45
it successful make it a successful run
42:47
and oftentimes even in the past during
42:51
interviews and things you know I make it
42:53
clear that I am NOT a representative
42:57
libertarian you know or representative
42:59
of the libertarian party but if I am
43:01
chosen to be the representative I will
43:04
make these things very clear you know
43:06
you people are concerned I’ve been it
43:08
you know I
43:09
eight different libertarian state
43:10
conventions over the past year and you
43:14
know a very important part of that is
43:15
our strategy of just simply showing the
43:18
people that I don’t have a boot attached
43:22
to my head all the time
43:24
I really don’t don’t tell us like
43:26
breaking new breaking news everyone
43:28
anyway
43:30
yeah no no screenshots that please but
43:32
you know and that I am NOT my character
43:34
I mean many people only know me from the
43:36
memes they only know me from the video
43:38
snippets right and they only have these
43:41
these these prejudices these
43:43
predetermined understanding of what it
43:45
is that I’m doing so you know I’m not
43:47
always on I’m not no he’s disruptive I’m
43:50
a very reasonable man
43:53
I’m a highly respected political
43:55
satirist ask anyone and I do have a
43:59
legitimate offer that I am putting on
44:02
the table you know I do have this thing
44:06
that I have developed and I am willing
44:09
to harness it or allow the Libertarian
44:12
Party to harness it for their purposes
44:15
okay fair enough now there has been some
44:18
concern about your aesthetic do you
44:20
think that spray-painting yourself
44:22
orange would make you more electable I
44:25
think it’s actually rolling around an
44:27
actual cheeto dust and it will make you
44:30
much tastier also people want to lick
44:33
you all over
44:33
and certainly lick the boot because I
44:35
think America really wants to lick the
44:38
boot lick the boot that’s why cuz it
44:40
tastes like Cheetos I never even thought
44:42
about that now let’s be serious for a
44:43
moment here is this all just a big rent
44:47
seeking ploy from big Pony to goose
44:49
their pony profits well I do have some
44:54
futures and pork bellies you know I will
44:57
not deny that but I will put them in a
44:59
blind trust once the pony based economy
45:01
gets going
45:02
certainly that’s I mean big pony all of
45:07
it said with blind trust so it’s a fair
45:10
compromise now that the third and fourth
45:12
platform poke the eyes out of the
45:14
Trust’s what’s that I’ll poke the trust
45:17
in the eyes Oh ditz yet know that that’s
45:19
I think that’s how that works now the
45:21
third and fourth platforms on your
45:22
of course our harnessing zombies for
45:25
unlimited energy and going back in time
45:26
to kill baby Hitler these seem pretty
45:28
self-explanatory to me but feel free to
45:30
add anything you think needs to be said
45:31
about either of those well of course a
45:34
zombie power it’s it’s clean its green
45:36
its carbon neutral you know I mean they
45:40
occasionally fall apart but you know you
45:42
just got to put it back together again
45:43
or create more zombies so yeah I think
45:46
that’s gonna pick up our fuel dependence
45:50
and it’s it’s gonna be great time travel
45:53
of course once that’s underway all
45:55
things are possible and I do believe in
45:58
fact that there has indeed been a small
46:01
tear in the time-space continuum and let
46:06
me assure you that I do have a number of
46:10
very smart scientists in the past and
46:13
the present in the future working to
46:17
remedy this situation and I do believe
46:21
that we will return to a vermin supreme
46:25
presidency any moment now I apologize
46:30
for any inconvenience in the interim
46:33
thank you thank you
46:35
now speaking of zombies and Hitler you
46:38
and I are both going to be Bobby Hitler
46:39
where Hitler well let me show you we’re
46:43
both going to be in the libertarian
46:44
dadbod calendar as you had mentioned
46:46
before you’ll be mr. October you’re on
46:48
the left and I of course will be mr.
46:51
April on the right
46:52
tell America why they desperately need
46:56
our bodies well you’ve got a masturbate
47:00
over something people and here we are
47:04
giving something to you the American
47:07
public can FAP over what could be better
47:09
than that
47:10
that is as horrifying as any answer I
47:13
could have given Thank You
47:15
vermin a lot of that the Free American
47:17
Pony Party does spell FAP I think you
47:21
should know that thank you
47:24
Firmin a lot of blame games and
47:26
finger-pointing between boomers and
47:27
Millennials have been going on boomers
47:29
are blaming millenials Millennials are
47:31
blaming boomers sometimes Generation X
47:33
and Gen Z get thrown into it
47:35
occasionally why is no one
47:36
the blame on the Silent Generation where
47:39
it belongs yeah that would be a lot
47:42
easier those chumps it uh you know Eli
47:46
Whitney he invented the cotton gin I
47:48
think he deserves a lot of a lot of the
47:51
credit for the downfall society you know
47:55
there’s a lot of you Alexander Graham
47:56
Bell he he directly that started that
48:00
whole cellphone thing eventually yeah
48:04
Henry Ford for example trouble maker of
48:08
yeah Andrew Carnegie trouble maker yeah
48:13
well those all those things but once we
48:16
get the time travel system up and
48:17
running oh yeah
48:18
I think things are gonna be going good
48:20
yeah absolutely right well you know we’d
48:22
like to point out that uh zombie
48:24
technology is infallible there has never
48:27
been an accidental zombie release from a
48:30
FEMA licensed zombie turbine facility
48:32
thank you yes all I’m saying is Fred
48:35
Rogers got off real easy really that’s
48:38
that’s that’s all I’m trying to say
48:39
they’re not you have in the past you
48:41
refer to yourself in a neighborhood is
48:44
it really a beautiful day sir now in the
48:47
past you’ve referred to yourself as a
48:48
friendly fascist as opposed to
48:50
unfriendly Fassett fascist such as
48:52
Mussolini and Chris Christie do you can
48:55
still consider yourself a friendly
48:56
fascist and if so tell us a little about
48:58
friendly fascism well I I do in fact
49:03
still use the tagline and I just believe
49:08
it if you’re going to be a lord it over
49:11
or you know give your life over to some
49:14
authoritarian individual that you should
49:17
at least have a simulated personal
49:20
feel-good relationship about that person
49:23
so yeah I think when the boot is on your
49:27
neck the person with the boot on on your
49:30
neck should be smiling and asking if
49:33
you’re comfortable
49:33
cuz that’s only right there that’s only
49:36
fair that’s only fair I think that’s
49:39
only fair if someone’s gonna oppress you
49:41
at the threat of harm and death and rob
49:43
you then they should be nice about it
49:45
yeah it’s it’s one of the themes that I
49:48
often bring up to the riot
49:50
police or just the police that are
49:53
trying to round us all up or whatever I
49:56
do like to point out that I do expect a
49:59
certain level of professionalism in the
50:02
in my oppression thank you very much I
50:04
think that that’s only fair I think that
50:06
you know why be unfair in that situation
50:08
um now speaking of which as you would
50:11
mention before and for those who don’t
50:12
know you you have a history of
50:13
de-escalation of tension between police
50:15
and protesters there’s actually recently
50:17
uh about a year or two ago well two
50:20
years ago now there was a video which I
50:23
was not able to find just the clip of it
50:25
but you even stopped a group of anthem I
50:28
think they were Anti Fog protesters from
50:30
basically pummeling a trump supporter
50:32
during the Trump inauguration there was
50:35
this thing called the deplorable which
50:38
was a Trump supporters celebrating his
50:41
inauguration ant if I showed up I guess
50:43
they cornered one of them and and you’re
50:45
basically there defusing it stopping
50:47
them from you know beating this guy into
50:48
ending up in the hospital I find it very
50:51
interesting to watch I want to get your
50:53
thoughts on this this this I know it’s
50:55
not necessarily a new phenomena but it’s
50:57
new and being an older millennial and
51:00
for people younger than me this is kind
51:01
of a new phenomena for us watching
51:03
private citizens sort of dressing up in
51:05
costumes and beating each other up in
51:07
the streets while their actual
51:09
oppressors who were in uniform the
51:11
actual people who rob and subjugate them
51:13
kind of stand by and play referee what
51:15
are your thoughts on all of this and how
51:16
this is playing out well I will point
51:20
out that Europe has football hooligans
51:23
right and they are an extreme they’re
51:26
extremely violent gangs I think the
51:29
football hooligans they seem to get a
51:32
lot more of they’re a lot more violence
51:35
out than many of the street fighters
51:38
here in America not to justify it or
51:41
minimize it in any way shape or form
51:44
but you know the inter protester
51:47
violence if it is sort of a new and
51:50
interesting and disturbing trend the the
51:56
one the instant you are calling forth
52:00
did in fact happen at the deplorable
52:04
and I think Primo nutmeg still has that
52:07
footage up or at least their angle of it
52:10
James a slop he had the other angle and
52:14
I think he was with that gentleman and I
52:17
believe he’s bendy platforms I believe
52:19
okay that’s probably why I couldn’t find
52:21
I couldn’t find it I know I’ve seen it
52:23
before but I couldn’t find the actual
52:24
footage yes so the one of the angles
52:28
doesn’t exist anymore the other angle
52:31
still does and essentially what I saw I
52:35
did see that guy getting getting a
52:37
little bit beat up there a little bit
52:39
it was sticks he was a little bloody and
52:43
then when I came up upon him they were
52:46
he was with his guys and they were just
52:48
trying to figure out what to do and my
52:52
assessment was that he was a shit magnet
52:54
and they should he’d get him the fuck
52:55
out of there and in many instances
52:59
that’s often the best solution and that
53:02
was that was the solution that I offered
53:04
them that was the words that I had with
53:07
them and by telling them that the guy
53:11
was a shit magnet and they should get
53:12
him the fuck out of there
53:15
I did get credit for saving him from
53:17
from a beating that he might have got if
53:20
he continued not to get the fuck out of
53:23
there so a lot of these things are
53:25
common sense really yeah yeah yeah so
53:28
and I tend to agree with that I have
53:30
some follower questions I actually had
53:33
quite a few of them which I have
53:35
condensed into they’re basically many
53:37
variations of why are you literally
53:39
ruining everything which I think that
53:41
we’ve already addressed at this point I
53:42
think we’ve addressed the why are you
53:45
destroying everything I mean once again
53:47
I mean my involvement with the
53:50
Libertarian Party started when certain
53:53
members reached out to me for various
53:56
things Boomer Shannon from from
53:58
California he was instrumental in
54:01
bringing me into the party we worked on
54:05
a he had me do a fundraiser for the
54:09
Southern California Libertarian Party a
54:10
few years back and I was sort of the
54:13
guest that people were paying big money
54:15
for to attend an event for
54:18
and he raised a chunk of change for for
54:21
the Southern California Libertarian
54:23
Party at that time and then in 2016
54:28
Trent Solms former a leader of the or of
54:33
the youth caucus he reached out to me
54:35
and I believe it was when he was working
54:37
with the International Students for
54:40
liberty conference right and this
54:42
national students for liberty conference
54:44
brought me to their event they’ve
54:47
they’ve got enough of me to fly me and
54:51
my wife down and put us up in a hotel
54:53
room and I was given carte blanche to do
54:57
whatever I wanted to do in the it during
55:02
the opening of their events I was to
55:04
interrupt the president of the
55:05
organization speech and so I did that
55:09
and I did it with one of my scorching
55:12
renditions of the star-spangled banner
55:14
over the bullhorn complete with the the
55:17
Jimi Hendrix feedback which I’m
55:20
surprised it’s not more controversial in
55:22
its own right but all those kids seem to
55:25
enjoy the hell out of it and I spent a
55:27
wonderful weekend meeting all these
55:31
libertarian young people and once again
55:33
it was an eye-opener you know that and
55:36
you know my learning from the
55:39
libertarians in New Hampshire you know
55:41
it opened my eyes to how much support
55:43
and love that I had in the Libertarian
55:47
Party and that led to me directly
55:50
attending the Libertarian Party national
55:55
convention in Orlando in 2016 and that
55:59
was a very wonderful event there is
56:02
simply no other political party that
56:06
would have allowed me to get away with
56:08
having such wacky fun and hijinks with
56:12
the very convention the conventions of a
56:16
convention itself right it was I mean at
56:20
one point during the bill Wells
56:23
nomination I was walking around the
56:26
convention hall with a chair high above
56:29
my head high above my boot
56:32
walking it around and I was essentially
56:34
referencing the Bernie Bernie bro
56:37
alleged chair throwing incident that
56:39
occurred a little bit earlier than that
56:41
oh and and nobody nobody cared everybody
56:45
thought it was fine and and when I came
56:47
to understand was that pretty much half
56:50
the people there at the convention very
56:54
much enjoyed the fact that I was there
56:56
and was loving me having so much fun
56:59
with them the other half did not like it
57:03
very much at all however the half that
57:07
very much enjoyed it very much enjoyed
57:10
the fact that the other half was not
57:13
enjoying it so it also became a little
57:17
bit clearer that you know perhaps I was
57:19
a little bit of wedge issue perhaps
57:21
however I do believe that I have an
57:25
undeniable support in the Libertarian
57:29
Party there is a Syria there is a
57:32
appreciable number of individuals who
57:35
absolutely do support my candidacy and
57:39
as a result you know I have gathered or
57:42
people have volunteered I mean my
57:45
campaign manager Desiree Lindsey at you
57:48
know she approached me and asked me if I
57:50
want to make a serious run for the
57:52
Libertarian Party nomination right and
57:54
and she has to develop that into an
57:58
actual thing and has been guiding it and
58:01
at this point you know in any given
58:04
online poll which of course doesn’t
58:06
count for much but I do quite well if
58:11
you know up the top two or through
58:14
sometimes I mean when I went
58:16
head-to-head with John McAfee I think I
58:20
took came out like 73 percent on top and
58:23
then on two separate polls a
58:25
head-to-head with Justin Amash I think I
58:28
did 59 percent and so there is an
58:33
undeniable wave of support
58:36
am I the presumptive nominee I don’t
58:39
suspect that I am I would would not be
58:42
so presumptuous to claim to be the
58:44
presumptive
58:45
me but I and of course my internet
58:50
connection is unstable my computer’s
58:52
telling me but you know I do believe
58:54
that there are several solid arguments
58:58
why I would and could be the best
59:00
candidate for the Libertarian Party and
59:03
uh and there are indeed concerns in
59:06
reservations and arguments against and I
59:10
am certainly open I entertain these and
59:14
attempt to address these concerns and I
59:17
believe I’ve tried to address some of
59:19
them earlier um so it’s it’s really up
59:24
to the party up to the convention
59:26
delegates to decide whether that they
59:31
want to go this route I mean granted it
59:34
is a bold crazy wild idea but it’s just
59:39
so crazy it just might work or it may
59:44
feel mez miserably but we will know who
59:48
will know unless we try and so once
59:50
again you know I don’t have a vested
59:54
interest i I don’t you know I’ve been
59:56
doing this so long I you know I’m not
59:58
seeking power I don’t want to be or have
60:02
consolidate power in the Libertarian
60:05
Party I don’t want to control it or or
60:08
you know any of these things
60:10
I am simply making an offer I am putting
60:13
my offer on the table
60:16
you know I will work for you you know if
60:18
you want to use me in this capacity now
60:21
of course you know I’m trying to stack
60:23
the delegates much like any other
60:25
candidate because that’s simply the way
60:26
it’s done of course and we’ll just see
60:29
how successful it is and I you know
60:32
people like to play these political
60:34
games political nerds you know I mean
60:36
they are nerds political geeks are one
60:39
of my longest running audiences quite
60:41
frankly I mean people who follow
60:43
politics have known about me more than a
60:46
lot of other people I mean they they’ve
60:48
they pay attention to these things they
60:50
know what’s going up in New Hampshire
60:51
right
60:52
I mean sure primary it’s true I have
60:55
come in third against Obama when you
60:59
incoming I came in fourth in 2016 on the
61:03
Democratic slate when I ran against
61:05
Obama I pulled in 1.4 percent of the
61:08
primary vote so obviously there’s room
61:11
for improvement but once again that was
61:13
a an imaginary campaign if we write it
61:17
for real I think we can really pump up
61:19
the numbers I think we could do it
61:21
especially if everybody gets behind it
61:24
so you know I am the pragmatic candidate
61:27
I mean I think obviously travel it
61:31
obviously the pragmatic candidate yeah I
61:34
believe it a number of pragmatists our
61:38
understanding that pragmatically
61:40
speaking that sure I stand a legitimate
61:45
chance moreso than some of uh perhaps
61:48
reaching that golden 5% so you basically
61:52
just answered all but one of my many
61:55
follower quiet-like I had all these
61:57
listed and you pretty much I think you
61:59
might have had access to my notes
62:00
because you were basically answering all
62:02
of them there’s there’s one more which
62:05
which gives credence to the idea that
62:07
you exist in all time planes and
62:09
universes so but so there’s this one
62:12
question you did seem to miss which
62:14
someone said you’ve been doing this for
62:15
so long we all know you’re basically the
62:17
Tom Brady of American modern American
62:19
politics but do you think there will be
62:21
a point when you decide to pass your
62:23
boot on to the next generation or are
62:25
you in this for as long as you’re here
62:26
oh I think I’ve got a few good runs left
62:30
in me for sure 24 is right around the
62:32
corner 28 my original projections I was
62:36
basing them on America’s slow decline
62:39
and my slow rise and I knew they would
62:43
be somewhere and my my guess had always
62:47
been that it was going to be around 2036
62:49
is when I would reach the White House
62:52
however I’ve had to revise this given my
62:55
current popularity in in the Libertarian
62:58
Party and you know I know it’s a real
63:01
campaign because I am receiving a lot of
63:04
opposition and so that that can that
63:07
only show us how real it is that people
63:09
are so strongly opposed and actively
63:11
opposed to it right
63:13
I hope to win these people over and if I
63:16
can’t win them over right and a number I
63:19
have asked a number of people you know I
63:21
mean I know you will not support me in
63:23
the decision but if I am the libertarian
63:27
nominee will you support me and
63:29
generally they have said yes yeah if if
63:34
you were to let’s just devil’s advocate
63:37
sake of argument you were not to get the
63:39
Libertarian Party nomination and you
63:41
were offered the vice president slot by
63:44
Democratic nominee Marianne Williamson
63:46
would you accept it I would have to
63:50
think about that for sure okay it would
63:53
be quite an entertaining laughs that’s
63:55
true
63:56
okay thank you vermut so I I know I
63:58
gotta let you go soon I have one more
64:00
segment called final my fellow Americans
64:03
which is basically I’m going to give you
64:05
30 seconds which is not nearly enough
64:07
time but I’m going to give you a series
64:10
of policy positions that I personally
64:12
hold near and dear and you will tell me
64:15
yes or no if you’ll add them to your
64:17
list of campaign promises or not how’s
64:20
that sound
64:20
well is it a I can say it but not
64:23
actually do it correct I mean you say
64:28
yeah sure that’s a great idea
64:29
excellent you can absolutely you can
64:32
absolutely promise whatever you want to
64:34
promise so 30 seconds on the clock
64:36
good luck and I will start now arm all
64:39
prison inmates okay make every eighth
64:44
week day a paid federal holiday
64:47
absolutely it goes to a metric my
64:50
concept of metric time yes no no keep
64:52
going okay
64:53
price caps for sex workers
64:56
I don’t know about that but the market
64:59
will bear baby with the market will bear
65:01
ok blame the housing crisis on Bob Villa
65:04
Oh Bob yeah ok gay heroin for toddlers
65:12
what what do I look like Austin Peterson
65:15
or something free cheesy bread with the
65:18
purchase of any federal explosives
65:20
permit absolutely ok kill all the
65:23
remaining honeybees only if we can
65:27
replace them with robot bees ok
65:28
dehumanize anyone named Jeff would that
65:33
include Jeffery sure yeah ok ok they
65:39
won’t be human anymore well we’re just
65:40
gonna not treat them like they’re human
65:42
what will we treat them like they’re
65:44
ponies i we can create a new subhuman
65:46
standard for Jeff’s well dogs people
65:49
treat dogs really nice I’m alright yeah
65:54
I mean if Jeff was your dog you treat
65:57
him really nice yeah I would I would
65:58
treat Jeff like I treat my dog like I
66:01
treat my dog like my own right I mean
66:04
Jeff would be subhuman but you’d still
66:07
feed them and care for them and take a
66:09
look right gilded cages for Jeff ok 50%
66:13
tariffs on anything from Cleveland that
66:17
sounds fair ok and then the final one
66:20
which is the official platform of
66:22
muddied waters media legalizing
66:25
recreational plutonium well what else
66:29
would you use it for yeah exactly
66:32
exactly so vermin thank you again for
66:36
coming on this has been everything I
66:38
hoped it would be and more I hope to
66:39
have you on again soon I know I need to
66:41
let you go but before I let you go I
66:43
just want to give you a chance to give
66:45
your final thoughts anything you thought
66:47
we didn’t get a chance to discuss
66:48
anything upcoming that you want to
66:50
promote like for example the libertarian
66:52
dad bod calendar anything else that you
66:54
want to say vermin supreme the floor is
66:57
yours
67:00
well yes friends the switch to a pony
67:07
based economy will revolutionize the way
67:09
America does biz
67:10
pony’s create American jobs ponies will
67:13
revitalize in America
67:14
ponies are green transportation solution
67:16
they produce usable methane gas they
67:18
were lower our dependence on foreign oil
67:20
they are an abundant source of Pony
67:21
based fertilizer and they are the future
67:23
of America they are delicious they are
67:27
cute they are recyclable in summation
67:29
free ponies for all no new taxes and
67:32
economic prosperity for all together we
67:36
will ride our ponies into a zombie
67:40
powered future
67:43
thank you I’m vermin supreme I hope you
67:45
read my new book I Pony blueprint for a
67:47
new America lots of good illustrations
67:50
visit my campaign website we have bumper
67:53
stickers we have glitter ties we have a
67:56
little buttons with my face on it how
67:59
funny are those in case I’ll see y’all
68:04
the convention I’ll see you at your
68:05
state conventions if you have any
68:08
questions feel free to reach out to me
68:09
once again I’m not a lunatic I merely
68:12
pray one when we internet and I’m
68:15
willing to play that for you the
68:18
Libertarian Party of America peace are
68:22
you coming to Florence in November
68:24
Florence South Carolina I am working on
68:28
that that’s a that would be November 2nd
68:30
that’s a debate it’s a very interesting
68:32
question I believe that I have achieved
68:35
all the benchmarks I think I’ve raised
68:37
enough money to be in there ok however
68:39
they there is something about there a
68:42
dress code and they are specifically
68:45
trying to prohibit prop clothing and I
68:53
forget this something about head wear so
68:57
I’m a little concerned that my religious
68:59
freedoms might be a abridged or my
69:03
ability to freely express myself with a
69:05
boot on my head so there’s there’s a few
69:08
things that I’m going I have to work out
69:09
with mr. flood the state chair I just
69:12
dropped him a note in fact and but
69:15
fingers crossed hopefully so yeah I’m
69:19
gonna talk with my Scop people because
69:22
I’m good muddy waters are going to be
69:23
the
69:24
the official promoters and podcasters at
69:27
that event and I did not know that so
69:30
I’m gonna I’m gonna talk to my people
69:31
so check check get back to me on that
69:34
well yeah I’m gonna get back to you on
69:36
that because that’s first I’ve heard of
69:37
that but Furman thank you again I’m
69:39
gonna talk to you really briefly during
69:40
the outro so give me one second guys
69:41
thanks you again thank you again for
69:43
tuning in to this episode of my fellow
69:45
Americans I hope that this was as
69:46
edifying an experience as it was for me
69:49
and for my friend vermin
69:52
we don’t have an episode of the writer’s
69:54
block or mr. America the bearded truth
69:56
this week but be sure to tune in next
69:58
week on Tuesday for the next episode of
70:02
the muddy waters of freedom were Matt
70:04
Wright and I parse through the week’s
70:06
events with the joy and and reverence of
70:09
a sweet summer boy and then I’m actually
70:12
not going to be here next week for my
70:15
fellow Americans I will be out of town
70:17
doing some other very large very Jewish
70:20
thing but be sure to tune in the
70:23
following week and I’m sure I will be
70:24
back with yet another exciting and
70:27
amazing guest so guys thank you again
70:29
for tuning in to my fellow Americans and
70:31
god bless you
70:32
[Music]